King Kong (Year​-​of​-​EPs #12)

by Danny Saucedo

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about

Year-of-EPs #12: Wow. This is it. I promised you one free EP a month, every month for a year, and here they all are. We didn't miss a deadline and that's thanks to the tireless work of everyone who helped me out. This EP is dedicated to Evan Owen, without whom I would be not unlike a small child lost in the woods, blind and covered in honey. Delicious honey.

credits

released August 31, 2011

Engineered, Edited, Recorded, Produced, Arranged, Conducted and Magically Protected by Evan Owen

Additional production assistance (and bell peppers) provided by Rebecca Morris

tags

license

all rights reserved
Track Name: Under the Stars
Every time I come here I feel the same
In that I feel completely different
Usually when someone says “What’s your name?”
I feel like I’m saying C-C-C-C-Clark Kent

Like maybe this could be
A reasonable facsimile
A modern-day marvelous
Secret Identity
Is it still me?
Is it just me?

Every time I come here I sing that song
And everybody sings the words
The lights are bright upon me, I’m King Kong
And every little clap, my heart flap-flaps like birds

Like maybe this could be
The birth of my celebrity
A red carpet, carpe diem
Times infinity
Is it still me?
Is it just me?

I try to be a single entity
But different situations seem to call for different versions of
Me, as a meme ever evolving
Seems funny that they’d keep an extra-temporal haven for me
To return the favor

Every time I come here you look the same
In that you’re congruent with your still image
Everybody’s got a holy name
So I walk-walk-walk this pilgrimage

Like maybe this could be
A test of my divinity
A prayer circle in search of
Lasting serenity
Is it still me?
Is it just me?

I try to be a single entity
But different situations seem to call for different versions of
Me, as a meme ever evolving
Seems funny that they’d keep an extra-temporal haven for me
To return the favor
Track Name: Neil deGrasse Tyson
Neil deGrasse Tyson
Is a Titan of the Mind
Like a chocolate Carl Sagan
His sagaciousness tickles my spine

He’s not worried about the children (Oh no no)
He’s worried about the adults (No no no)
He’s not worried about the violence (No no no)
It’s science in the hands of dolts

Oh Neil, tell me why
We aren’t living in space stations on the moon
And Neil, tell me why
We won’t be getting to Mars very soon

He’s not worried about the end times (No no no)
He’s worried about the here-and-now (Now now now)
He’s just worried about a future (No no no)
Where science is just a cash cow

Neil deGrasse Tyson
Is a Titan of the Mind
Like a godless Johannes Kepler
He knows what makes the universe divine

He’s not worried like Neil Cavuto (Oh no no)
He knows the Earth’s not the enemy (No no no)
If you step up he’ll treat you like Pluto (No no no)
And demote you permanently

Oh Neil, tell them how
You would improve our un-intelligent design
And Neil, tell them why
Nothing will happen when the planets all align

(Oh no no)
(No no no)
(No no no)

Raise your glass to Neil
To a real man of science
Track Name: Lonely Little Party God
Behold, a lonely, little Party God
Living underneath couch cushions with all of your lost buds
But if you listen close he might tell you what’s up

If youth is wasted on the young, then let’s get wasted and have fun
If dreams're wasted on the old, then let’s let’s go on dreaming
Sing it out, sing “Celebrate Good Times” and “Shout”
Wring yourself out, every drop counts, every drop counts

Behold, the state of your former deity
You gave him up for adoption so you could watch more TV
But if you listen up you might still hear his decree

If youth is wasted on the young, then let’s get wasted and have fun
If dreams're wasted on the old, then let’s let’s go on dreaming
Sing it out, sing “Celebrate Good Times” and “Shout”
Wring yourself out, every drop counts, every drop counts

Behold, how small a Party God can get, when all of his followers
All his followers forget to wear their priestly vestments and buy their holy incense
But if you listen well I promise he will make sense

If youth is wasted on the young, then let’s get wasted and have fun
If dreams're wasted on the old, then let’s let’s go on dreaming
Sing it out, sing “Don’t Speak” by No Doubt
Wring yourself out, every drop counts, every drop counts
Track Name: Survey
Question Number One:
Do you turn the radio off when you’re driving around lost?
In the space between all the things you would do
And all the things you will do
How many cars could you park?
What’s your native biome?
Favorite Food?
Favorite Song?
Actual Favorite Song?

Please circle all early-20th-century-eugenics designations
and mid-90s-high-school-movie-social-hierarchy categories
that have, do or will apply to you:
Negroid/Caucasoid/Spazoid/Mongoloid
Jock/Nerd/Gypsy/Drama Geek
Slut/Prude/Prussian/Punk
Hunk/Hun/Goth/Visigoth
Invisible/Invincible/Indochine
Chic/Freak/Mozambique/Mudblood
Adult Disguised as a Teenager
Teacher’s Pet/Burnout/Brahmin/Bully
Beggar/Braggart/Bastard
Adult Trapped in a Teenager’s Body
Vengeful Ghost/Peaceful Corpse/Dirt

True or False: Eventually the rhythm is going to get you.
Do you pay for music?
Given the opportunity, would you sell out?
Are you
Are you sure about that?
Are you going to eat that?
How many
How many times have you
How many times have you hung up on someone
And blamed it on bad reception?
Are you going to listen to this whole thing?

When was the first
When was the first time you tasted alcohol?
What do you want to be when you grow up?
Have you ever
Would you ever
Would you negotiate with terrorists?

Will you ever
Will you ever stop?

Question Twenty-Seven: Do you regret the way you treated
Your First Kiss
Your First Lay
Your First Love
D. All of the above

Estimate and Average the following:
% of your Exes you can still have dinner with
Fraction of People at your 10-year reunion you will give
A Fraction of a Shit about
Weekly decisions you make out of spite

In a head-to-head battle with your 10-year old self, could you win at:
[ ] Two-square
[ ] Tether ball
[ ] Checkers
[ ] Quarters
[ ] An argument
[ ] Life

Finish this sentence:
Scale of 1 to 10

Dot eyes, cross tees
Fill-in-the-blanks
And don’t forget to show your work

Please check all that apply
[ ] I should be on TV
[ ] I would survive zombies
[ ] Everything sucks
[ ] I am happier now than I was five years ago
[ ] Punk is Dead
[ ] Batman for President
[ ] I deserve to be happy
[ ] I am an adult
[ ] I would rather be a cartoon
[ ] My friends know something that I don’t
[ ] 9/11 was an inside job
[ ] I really want to hear about your weird dream
[ ] I am happier now than I was ten years ago
[ ] I like myself

If
If you
When you find what you are looking for
What will you look for next?
Track Name: New Man
To return to the roots
To become the roots
To be buried in dirt
To become the good word
Who do you think I am?

Who do you think I am?
I don't know

To return to the soil
To become the soil
To eat the seeds
To become a redwood tree
Who do you think I am?

Who do you think I am?
I don't know

Sometimes I wish that I was still that person that you ran to
With all your problems but I’m not your dad
Wish that I could solve all of your crying shames with simple games
And sayings that I pulled right out of my ass
Ask me all of the questions
That you were too young to know that you should have been asking
Asking me

Like who do you think you are?
I don’t know

Sometimes I wish that we all lived in the same place so we could
See all of each other every single night
But I know if we spread out like seeds or sleeper cells
Then we can tell the big bad world to go straight to hell
Hello, all of my old friends
We are too young to have lost so many branches

I am, I am the Redwood
I am a New Man, and so are you
So are you